13 May 2015

Post #91

I work at a little, neighborhood, family run flooring store.

My work consists of managing bills, accounts, etc.  Not sales.  However, when duty calls?

My attempt at a sale:

Potential Customer:  I found this carpet at Home Depot for $0.98/sf with installation for only $100.00.

Me:  Can I show you some comparable carpets for a competitive price?  Have they given you a comprehensive measure and bid?  Because we will do that for free and discount their measure fee on the estimate.

Naive Customer:  No, but it says $0.98/sf with installation for only $100.00.

Sales Lady of the Year: Make like the Gingerbread Man. Run, run back to Home Depot now and get there as fast as your fucking hooves can take you!!!  Here, I'll even open the door for you, because that's a goddamn steal.

Potential comeback customer when they get their actual estimate from Home Depot.

Don't get me wrong, I shop at Home Depot, it's just that their carpet section is a crock of shit!  Such a big one in fact, that a herd of elephants could defecate in it for a goddamn year!

I was clearly meant to be in this profession.

Katie E. Eshelman