04 January 2012

Post #60

Holy crap, it's 2012.

On the business side of things?  Juan finally came back with our computer.  He pimped the shit out of it. I'm not positive all of it was totally legal...so yeah, moving on.

On the personal side of things?  I decided that I wanted to pursue another endeavor in life.  I want to be the face of the container-of-wine known as Almaden. (I really should buy stock in it.) My sister thought it was a fantastic idea so I made her my marketing director and advertising guru. Hence...

No "box" is too big.

The continuing adventures of Zach and his iPhone... 

My dad got pissed at Siri...again.  He actually screamed into the phone "How many fucking boyfriends do you have?!!"  Apparently, when Siri doesn't answer him he thinks she is off gallivanting with someone else.  He thinks Siri is a whore, I guess she kind of is.  In any case, she didn't respond.

And now!  I introduce to you his sidekick Jeri!

This week I learned that you should never tell your mother that a childhood friend is the on the new 'Bachelor.'  Big, fat, fatal error.

Stop watching Mom.

Funny thing about that photo?  It's a screen shot of my sister's phone.  My mom called me once.  I'm quite confident that she inferred from my tone that I wasn't going to answer again.  Sorry Megan.

I continue to live in a constant struggle with Bitch Tits.  I was forced to take away her friendship bracelet the other day, the little shit viciously attacked me.  She almost broke skin.  Finally gave it back to her because she learned her new trick.  To sit on command.  I truly hope her New Years' resolution is to stop fucking with me. 

Well, here's to another year.

Katie E. Eshelman

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