13 July 2011

Post #33

Things a chick should most assuredly know how to do: 

-How to pick a pair of sunglasses that fit your face.  Sunglasses are made to shade your eyes from the sun, not your entire skull...they make hats and paper bags for that.  I'll go ahead and add a subcategory to this: How to pick a pair of jeans that don't double as a band clamp. Ladies it is perfectly acceptable to wear the size jeans that fit you...nobody can see the tag, but they sure as hell can see your love grips.  

-How to drive a vehicle with a manual transmission.  Hell, you need to know how to drive correctly in general. 

-Drink beer, whiskey, and bathtub gin.  You can refer to Post #32 for the rest of this why, when and how.

-Change a tire, change a light bulb, lower the level of your drunk voice, not buy a cat.  Shit. It's 3:55?  What the fuck am I still doing at the office?  

Closing time,

Katie E. Eshelman

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